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Thursday, May 7, 2009

What does Palm Bay have to Offer

The Mayor and other important City Officials tell us that if the voters vote yes on the Palm Bay Works Referendum May 12, special election Things are going to be Great. Streets will be fixed. Rainbows will appear and business will flock here just begging the citizens to work at high paying jobs. Where have we heard that before? and how many times? Businesses will be attracted to Palm Bay and set up shop providing a new tax base. Sounds like total Bull shit to me.
The thing that attracts people to Palm Bay is the Cheap Housing. Its just a fact. We all want to own part of the American Dream and Palm Bay offers us a chance to buy a house we can afford. Plain and simple. When we want to have a good time we leave town and head to Melbourne or somewhere else. We have no movie theaters no real shopping areas. West Melbourne has a new shopping area and we are so lucky to have the traffic it is generating plus if we shop there we have to pay a special little tax to pay off the developers debt. So what draws people to Palm Bay? What brings in the crowds spending money to stimulate our economy NOTHING! They might drive in town to work here spend $5 bucks on lunch maybe put some gas in the tank every so often. Sometimes the soccer fields down West Malabar Road bring the crowds in they may buy some Gatorade at the Kangeroo Express Maybe Sonny's for lunch during a tournament. I do not see the lines of cars pulling into our world class golf course the Majors They play their 18 holes and get the hell out Driving out of town on those nice smooth landscaped roads that lead in and out of Our Palm Bays little Jewel BaySide and our beautiful World Class Golf Course. Occasionally we get a fair at BCC or "the Big Squeeze" That's what you should have called the Referendum Mayor Mazziotti.The Big Squeeze. But We really don't have much. Once a year we pack the Puerto Ricans for their Big Parade and Party, but that's a money loser for the City plus there is always a big mess to clean up at tax payers expense. The Farmers Market at City Hall? Lets face it there is nothing here because Palm Bay Sucks. People in other towns refer to Palm Bayers as "those People" But hey pretty soon we will have some of the best income generating Red Light Cameras. We should also patrol Our section of I95 and set up a speed trap. Because people are speeding by and not stopping because there is nothing here except Cheap housing and everything that cheap housing brings and that is Palm Bay.

1 comment:

  1. lol I have to agree, it's super boring, lol I think this is hilarious. Good Job I guess.